Couldn't agree more. I knew AA wasn't for me when the "leader" of the group approached me in the local grocery store and very publicly asked if I'd be going to the next meeting....Safe to say I didn't make that meeting or any other after that.
Once I found other programs that didn't roll the victim card or the "higher power" dogma and leaned on science and exercise it clicked for me. I found a tribe that was based around hard work not hard prayers and that proved to be my secret sauce. Truth be told the spiritual side worked its way back into the picture on it's own once I was healthy and whole.
I'm not saying that AA doesn't have it's place, as you're eluding to but I think it's important for everyone to know that is very far from the only option in regards to finding your personal road to recovery.
AA wasn't right for me either Lindsey. A big part of it was that false idea that people who are addicted to alcohol are born with the incurable illness of alcoholism; that there is something defective in people who become addicted - rather than the addictive substance of alcohol being to blame! I was so relieved when I found This Naked Mind - have you read it? - that completely changed my perspective on alcohol addiction.
Thanks for your response, Ellie! I haven't read This Naked Mind, but it's on my shelf! What was your main takeaway/what makes it different from other books about quitting alcohol? Would love to know your thoughts!
1. Alcohol is an addictive substance to ALL humans. Anyone who drinks is at risk of addiction.
2. There is no such thing as 'normal' drinkers vs 'alcoholics' - alcohol addiction exists on a spectrum, and actually most people who drink regularly would be classified as 'alcoholics' according to the self-diagnostic tool
3. That the true path to freedom is to unpack all the beliefs we have about alcohol that are keeping us trapped, that we have learned from culture and experience e.g. 'alcohol helps me relax', 'alcohol makes me feel confident', 'alcohol helps me escape my troubles', to learn what alcohol actually does to our brains and bodies and to start to really notice what alcohol is actually doing
Omg. Same…. Id go 3 times a day. Service everywhere. My latest most horrific relapse has changed my perspective on so much about AA. I didn’t got looking for my relapse but it didn’t stop. And I got harmed within AA so badly that I am utterly traumatized from going back. I miss it si much but I absolutely cannot trust anyone anymore there. 12 stepped or not, multiple years or not, zero difference to what harm snd exploitation to people in early recovery. And im too scared to call for a group conscience…. Devastating tbh snd nearly killed me.
Couldn't agree more. I knew AA wasn't for me when the "leader" of the group approached me in the local grocery store and very publicly asked if I'd be going to the next meeting....Safe to say I didn't make that meeting or any other after that.
Once I found other programs that didn't roll the victim card or the "higher power" dogma and leaned on science and exercise it clicked for me. I found a tribe that was based around hard work not hard prayers and that proved to be my secret sauce. Truth be told the spiritual side worked its way back into the picture on it's own once I was healthy and whole.
I'm not saying that AA doesn't have it's place, as you're eluding to but I think it's important for everyone to know that is very far from the only option in regards to finding your personal road to recovery.
Well said SG. Thank you.
AA wasn't right for me either Lindsey. A big part of it was that false idea that people who are addicted to alcohol are born with the incurable illness of alcoholism; that there is something defective in people who become addicted - rather than the addictive substance of alcohol being to blame! I was so relieved when I found This Naked Mind - have you read it? - that completely changed my perspective on alcohol addiction.
Thanks for your response, Ellie! I haven't read This Naked Mind, but it's on my shelf! What was your main takeaway/what makes it different from other books about quitting alcohol? Would love to know your thoughts!
Lots of takeaways! The biggest one's being:
1. Alcohol is an addictive substance to ALL humans. Anyone who drinks is at risk of addiction.
2. There is no such thing as 'normal' drinkers vs 'alcoholics' - alcohol addiction exists on a spectrum, and actually most people who drink regularly would be classified as 'alcoholics' according to the self-diagnostic tool
3. That the true path to freedom is to unpack all the beliefs we have about alcohol that are keeping us trapped, that we have learned from culture and experience e.g. 'alcohol helps me relax', 'alcohol makes me feel confident', 'alcohol helps me escape my troubles', to learn what alcohol actually does to our brains and bodies and to start to really notice what alcohol is actually doing
I could go on forever lol! But if you're curious I've written a post all about it https://ellienova.substack.com/p/the-day-everything-changed
I read the book and also did the 30 Day Alcohol Experiment which really helped. I mean, it got me sober, so totally changed my life!
So in short.... highly recommend!
What books have you read that you've found helpful? x
Well said. (I have even stronger views against AA.) The concept of the Higher Self offers a much better framework.
I tried to not sound so ick about it because I respect that AA works for many people...but the rooms definitely give me the ick! Thanks for reading :)
Omg. Same…. Id go 3 times a day. Service everywhere. My latest most horrific relapse has changed my perspective on so much about AA. I didn’t got looking for my relapse but it didn’t stop. And I got harmed within AA so badly that I am utterly traumatized from going back. I miss it si much but I absolutely cannot trust anyone anymore there. 12 stepped or not, multiple years or not, zero difference to what harm snd exploitation to people in early recovery. And im too scared to call for a group conscience…. Devastating tbh snd nearly killed me.